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Funny online shopping quotes

Witty quotations by shoppers, old wise proverbs and humourous catchprases on shops

Read funny sayings about shopping sprees, retail therapy and other names for (online) shopping. Shopping is an ancient tradition and so are these sayings about it. Funny, humorous and sometimes hilarious shopping quotes done by shopaholics and shop lovers.

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Quote categories

  • I'm not buying anything else...unless it's on sale, 50% off or glows in the dark
  • My bank account may be empty, but my shopping cart is full of dreams
  • I'm not a shopaholic, I'm just indecixive about where to put my money
  • Girlfriend warning: may spontaneously add things to cart while browsing. Not responsible for empty bank accounts
  • I could give up shopping, but I'm not a quitter
  • Keep calm and go shopping
  • Shortest horror story ever: 'Sold out'
  • When the going gets tought, the tough go shopping
  • Sweating while you shop counts as exercise

Do you know more quotes and sayings?

Just send an e-mail to reactions [at]


Funny shopping quotes

  • I need to stop, I whispered to myself as I clicked add to cart
  • A woman has two problems: 1) nothing to wear and 2) no room for all the clothes
  • Whoever said that money can't buy happiness, simply didn't know where to go shopping
  • Cinderella is proof that a new pair of shoes can change your life
  • I feel like a failure, I've been shopping for 20 years and I still don't have anything to wear
  • Dear Lord, please don't let my boyfriend be home when all my online orders arrive. Amen
  • Work hard so you can shop harder
  • Save the earth, it's the only planet where you can buy chocolate
  • Marriage is a workshop where the man works and the wife shops
  • I'm not a shopaholic, I'm helping the economy
  • Just let me shop, no one gets hurt

Retail therapy quotes

Not officially recognized by any health insurance, but there are many people thinking / knowing? that retail therapy helps more and is a lot cheaper than regular therapy...

  • My therapist told me to express myself, that's why I bought this entire outfit
  • Retail therapy is cheaper than regular therapy
  • Shopping beats therapy anytime; It costs the same and you get new clothes out of it
  • I have a degree in retail therapy

Shopping spree quotes

Are you not sure you want to go on a shopping spree? Let yourself be inspired by the best shopping spree quotes and citations about (online) shopping.

  • The only thing better than finding something you love is finding it on sale.
  • My bank account may be screaming, but my closet is singing
  • They say money can't buy happiness, but it can buy a lot of cute shoes. And that's basically the same thing


Contact: Do you have any funny tips and suggestigons? Please send an e-mail to reactions [at]